If I could see me now

In our newspaper there is a column where people look back to when they were younger and try to imagine what their young self would think of their current self.

If I could see me now, I think my young Lois would be a little disappointed that I hadn’t travelled more, explored more, had more adventures. I was a very imaginative child and always read a lot, and listened to the radio, and was desperate to see the world. If I’d written a top ten places to visit list I think it would have been:

  1. Tibet and Mount Everest
  2. the Amazon and Manaus
  3. Norway
  4. Egypt and the Pyramids
  5. the Great Wall of China
  6. South Africa
  7. Greenland
  8. travel along the Silk Road
  9. Pompeii
  10. the wild west of America

Well, I have been to Norway and to the USA, although not to the wild west although I did see a lot of people in cowboy hats and boots.

I wanted to be a great swimmer, an Olympic swimmer; I did swim well and represented my county, and maybe if glandular fever hadn’t struck I might even have made it further – but I know that I lacked that competitive, killer, winning instinct – I was too good a loser, and suffered terribly from pre-race nerves. I don’t swim these days, to be honest I find it boring, and hate the crowded noisy pools, although recently I have been having dreams of finding a nice beach to swim from…

I never wanted to get married; seeing women in those women’s magazines who spent their lives at home looking after their husbands and children, doing housework and domestic tasks, their hobbies also based around the home, cooking, knitting, needlework – that was the last thing I wanted! I loved my own home life with my parents and sister, and tried to emulate it for my own children, but when I was younger being a housewife and mother seemed like a prison. As for being married, I really did not want the traditional walking down the aisle all dressed in white which is what I suppose I focused on as ‘being married’. I guess also I had a lack of confidence, even when I was quite young, that anyone would want to marry me. In the event, when I did meet my handsome and wonderful life partner, I still really wasn’t that bothered about getting wed, but it was important for him – so we did, and we had a great time and five receptions!

I wanted to be a writer, ever since I first learned to write, that is what I wanted to do; so little Lois would be delighted that here I am writing! It’s taken a long time though; I tried to get into journalist college, I applied for so many different types of writing jobs, including with newspapers and magazines, and as an abstractor, but with absolutely no success… and in the end., having worked in the Civil service and at Manchester Airport, I drifted into teaching. I continued to write and sent of stories and novels year after year.

I think my little self would be amazed at what I have done, and the adventures I have had – different adventures from what a child might imagine, but adventures all the same!

If you haven’t read any of my novels, here is a link:





  1. David Lewis

    Little Dave would have loved to have had a friend like little Lois. I always liked the company of girls when I was young as there was something mysterious about them.Boys were from Mars and girls were from Venus!


  2. David Lewis

    Never trusted that Lone Ranger. Anyone that wears a mask is hiding something. It wasn’t until he was retired and very old that he found out that Keemo- Sabe meant horses ass.


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s