Kangaroo skin trousers

Here is a true story, names and places have been changed to protect the innocent – and the kangaroos.

Mae was far from home at university in a big, vibrant city. She had gone there not knowing a single person but soon made good friends and was never short of anyone to go out with. Her new friends came from all over the place, from far and wide and from all sorts of backgrounds. One of the gang was a lad called Joey; he was such a nice young man, kind generous, good-natured, but later, much later he agreed that he was in some ways a little too trusting.
It was their second year at uni and Joey was the first among them to celebrate his twenty-first. birthday. There was not going to be a big party, just him and his mates from his course going out into the city – a few drinks, a few pubs, a few clubs… Joey was wondering what to wear, not sure of what the plans were. They had all gathered in someone’s flat to share a birthday cake and give cards and congratulate the birthday boy.
Someone suggested Joey might wear a great gift his father had brought back from a trip to Australia; Joey’s dad travelled a lot and was always jetting off to some new place. On his return from the Antipodes his dad had brought Joey a pair of kangaroo skin trousers. They had fringes down the side seams and a lace up fly… very stylish – well actually nobody thought they were stylish at all – just the reverse, but somehow Joey was persuaded to wear them.
It was pretty much a boys night out and Mae didn’t go so the following day she and those who hadn’t been for the night out waited in the common room for last night’s revellers to put in an appearance.
Eventually people began to drift in, a splendid night had been had and the birthday had been well and truly celebrated. Unfortunately Joey had struggled with the laces on his flies – as anticipated by everyone else who thought it a great joke!! Luckily no embarrassing accidents had been caused, but a kindly bouncer had cut the laces with a handy switch-blade, totally illegal no doubt, and Joey had to rely on his belt to preserve his modesty.
Eventually Joey staggered into the common room, pale and green around the gills. He was very happy though, he’d had a wonderful night, surrounded by his pals, although he did admit maybe he wouldn’t wear the kangaroo skin trousers again.
Probably a good idea, someone said – and don’t worry if the police come in we didn’t give them your correct name and also we’ll give you an alibi!
If Joey had been able to blanch any more he would have done. Police? Police? What had he done? What on earth had he drunkenly done? He couldn’t remember anything to do with a policeman!
A tale was told – a stolen traffic cone, a confrontation with the police regarding the fastening or not of his kangaroo skin trousers, stealing a policeman’s helmet, being sick in a policeman’s helmet…
For the rest of the day Joey skulked, lurked, tucked himself away… and it was only much later everyone confessed there had been no stolen policeman’s helmet, no being sick anywhere, it had all been a little tease.
Joey was so relieved… however when he found a traffic cone in his room he did begin to wonder…

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